There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.     

P. J. O'Rourke

A pessimist is a man who thinks all women are bad. An optimist is a man who hopes they are.     

Chauncey Depew

If women didn’t exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.     

Arisztotelész Onassis

Women give us solace, but if it were not for women we would never need solace.     

Don Herold

If you want something said, ask a man; if you want something done, ask a woman.     

Margaret Thatcher

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.     

Chris Rock

Fake hair, fake nails, fake eyelash, artificial face and sometimes fake behavior, yet a woman will say she needs a real man.     

Unknown

Women are the real architects of society.     

Harriet Beecher Stowe

 

 

If your wife wants to learn to drive, don’t stand in her way.     

Unknown

If women are so bloody perfect at multitasking, how come they can’t have a headache and sex at the same time?     

Billy Connolly

 

 

In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.     

Woody Allen

Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. And they are both disappointed.     

Unknown

Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren’t.     

Margaret Thatcher

Modern woman is the missing link between apes and human beings.     

Graffiti

 

 

The trouble with my wife is that she is a whore in the kitchen and a cook in bed.     

Geoffrey Gorer

If you see a nice man with great personality, good dressings, nice and high morals and character. What you call him? Yes, a gentle man! Have you ever meet a gentle woman?     

Unknown

 

 

Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.     

Oscar Wilde

A woman’s mind is cleaner than a man’s – That’s because she changes it more often.     

Unknown

It may be the cock that crows, but it is the hen that lays the eggs.     

Margaret Thatcher

A woman wears her tears like jewelry.     

Unknown

To be beautiful, all a woman needs is a black pullover and a black skirt and to be arm in arm with a man she loves.     

Yves Saint Laurent

 

 

I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me.     

Rodney Dangerfield