If you would know what the Lord God thinks of money, you have only to look at those to whom he gives it.
I do not believe in an after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
You must give some time to your fellow men. Even if it’s a little thing, do something for others – something for which you get
no pay but the privilege of doing it.
Deer hunting would be a fine sport, if only the deer had guns.
William S. Gilbert
In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock.
Start by doing what’s necessary, then what’s possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible.
St. Francis of Assisi
Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the
I never make the mistake of arguing with people for whose opinions I have no respect.
When you make a mistake, don’t look back at it long. Take the reason of the thing into your mind, and then look forward. Mistakes
are lessons of wisdom. The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in your power.
You're either part of the solution or you're part of the problem.
If you just set out to be liked, you would be prepared to compromise on anything at anytime, and you would achieve nothing.
Few will have the greatness to bend history itself, but each of us can work to change a small portion of events, and in the total
of all those acts will be written the history of this generation.
John F. Kennedy
A professional is a man who can do his job when he doesn't feel like it; an amateur is one who can't when he does feel like it.
All life is a chance. So take it! the person who goes furthest is the one who is willing to do and dare.
Laugh at yourself, but don’t ever aim your doubt at yourself. Be bold. When you embark for strange places, don’t leave any of
yourself safely on shore. Have the nerve to go into unexplored territory.
He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
George Bernard Shaw
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
Modern man is the missing link between apes and human beings.
Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work at hand. The sun’s rays do not burn until brought to a focus.
Alexander Graham Bell
The trouble with my wife is that she is a whore in the kitchen and a cook in bed.
Eat the delicious food. Walk in the sunshine. Jump in the ocean. Say the truth that you're carrying in your heart like hidden treasure. Be silly. Be kind. Be weird. There's no time for anything else.
In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.
Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong
If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.
I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me.
Political language is designed to make lies sound truthful and murder respectable, and to give an appearance of solidity to pure wind.
Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.